BFL Report, Day 66: Dammit, dammit, dammit!

So for the past 66 days I've been psychotically careful about what I ate and when I ate it, I've been obsessive about getting to the gym six days a week, and I've been changing and looking significantly better. Not as good as I'd like, but there's still time. Then my back decides to go nutso on me again. And get this, I'm lifting more weight than I've ever lifted at the gym, but I don't injure myself at the gym, I injure myself putting on my freakin' shorts! And now I'm in too much pain to continue having effective workouts, so 78% of the way through the freakin' program, right when I need to be focused and really push myself, I'm being forced to skip workouts. And probably for the rest of the week. It's pretty likely that I'm going to have to quit the Body for Life Challenge altogether. I can't tell you how infuriating that is. This isn't something I was sucking at, I was doing pretty well. Probably wouldn't have made it to the champion level, but what-the-fuck-ever, I was doing pretty well with this. And then my damn back says, "Um, no." Grrrr. Maybe I should order a pizza.

Back Again Again

So my back has been doing really well since I started working out. A twinge here and there, but nothing maddening. Until Monday. I was putting on my shorts, and lifted my leg to do so, and felt my sacrum move in a way it shouldn't. And yes, ow. Fortunately, it was a fairly minor tweak, nothing that back exercises can't fix, but still, I've been semi-mobile for the past couple days. Most of Monday, I was twisted into some unnatural posture that I hadn't seen in myself for nearly a year (think That Yellow Bastard from the Sin City movie).

I've been taking a lot of hits emotionally lately. Some with friends, some with finances. I'm thinking it could be that sneaking back into my conscious thought life by way of physical pain. I'm pretty sure that was part of what was going on last year when my back went out in the midst of grieving my father (among other things). I'm learning to let a lot of stuff go, but as I learn that, I also learn just how much anxiety I walk around with all the time anyway. Hm.

Don't really have a neat way to wrap this up, but my back is slowly getting better. As far as the anxiety, I'm working on it.